Michael Carrick in for £18 million and We're Officially the Dumbest Team in the World

I think I'm going nuts here. We absolutely have the worst board here, and probably the dumbest manager in the world when it comes to finances.

What a way to do business, selling Ruud on the cheap and purchasing Carrick at £18 million. £18 million?!?!?! That's probably a couple of million pounds higher than the highest value he'd EVER command on the transfer market. We got fleeced, yet again. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

To compound our stupidity, Michael Carrick isn't even the best midfielder in Spurs! They have Jenas and Davids who are in no way worse off than Carrick. For freaking £18 million, you'd expect us to get all 3 of them instead of one. This is a desparate buy, almost as bad as the Rio purchase.

Not to pour scorn on Carrick, he's a decent passer of the ball, but he's not even near the top few midfielders in the English team. Right off the bat, you can think of Lampard, Gerrard, Becks, Cole and Jenas. The first four are definitely, without a shadow of a doubt better than Carrick. Teammate, or should I say ex-teammate Jenas is effy at best.

This off season is driving me bananas. Let's hope fucking Fergie sees more in Carrick than I can.

Goodbye Ruud

Well, so much for the United board holding out for £15 million. In the end we sold him for a cut-price of 15 million euros, which works out to something slightly more than £10 million (exchange here). Did I mention we have one of the weakest boards in the entire world of football?

To make things worse, we sold him to Real Madrid. I personally rather he joined Bayern Munich. Never really liked the way Real handled business. They resemble like a team I hate in the EPL....cough....Chelsea...cough.

Now without Ruud, you gotta start wondering where in the world the goals are going to come. I don't see any of our first team strikers consistantly scoring 20 goals per season. Rooney is a fantastic talent, but he's not an out-and-out striker. I certainly don't see Saha doing it, even if he's given the first team place. Ole's just returned from a long long layoff and Rossi's just too untested to put any faith in him.

So, where are the freaking goals going to come from? Looks like we're going back to the pre-Ruud days of scoring by committee. Time for the midfielders and wingers to do their part. Of the lot, only Scholes and Giggs are capable of scoring goals on a consistent basis. Maybe Ronaldo (if he bloody stays) might contribute to the tally. I don't see Fletch, Park or O'Shea doing much, considering their past performances.

Of course scoring by committee was so successful in the 90s, coz we have defenders like Daisy and Dolly. Look at the current crop of defenders and tell me who can consistantly head the bloody ball? We already have trouble heading the damn ball out of our own penalty area!

Thankfully all is not doom and gloom....yet. We have yet to dip our fingers in the transfer market, but I'm sure we'd screw that up as well. With Torres off the market, the pickings are slim. And the chances of us getting an establish player seems to diminish with time.

I'm not even going to speculate who we'd be getting. My main targets were Veira and Torres, but neither are going to step into Old Trafford. Everything else looks foggy at best. The only consolation this up and coming season is that Chelsea is going to probably win the title for the 3rd year running. Yup, you read that right, I said 'consolation'. With Liverpool significantly strengthening their squad, I'm glad Chelsea and Abramo'bitch' are around.

Everything Wrong with Football

Seriously football is getting from bad to anal.

FIFA and the Zidane Episode
I'm pretty sure FIFA is made up of monkeys. I mean Zidane, who retired from international football, was banned for 3 matches and given a paltry fine. Don't these idiots at FIFA know what retirement is? Not to mention that fine....ouch! It much really hurt Zidane's pocket to be fined £3260.

As for Materazzi, he was fined £2170 and given a 2 match ban for the heinous crime of being a victim of a headbutt. I have no idea what's on FIFA's mind or which set of animals run it.

Glazer and Debt
Looks like Glazer's team managed to reduce the annual interest payments but increased the overall debt incurred. So now apparently we are able to afford the interest payments and still plunge into the transfer markets to buy the players we want (more on that later). The question now is, given that we have the money for the interest payment and transfer kitty, when in the world can we actually reduce our new debt of £660 million?

New Players?
Dream on. We look hopeless on the transfer markets. I have no idea who we're targetting, but one thing's for sure, we look like we're going to get fleeced yet again.

For once I actually miss Martin Edwards. He's the only one able to stand up to Fergie and say 'NO Fergie...that's a bad Fergie!'. Every other idiot who has succeed him has been giving in to Fergie's fancy, resulting in over-priced and over-rated players who simply cannot perform in a red jersey. Players like Veron, Kleberson and Forlan come to mind. Even when we get good players, we tend to over pay (Rio, Rooney), coz none of the donkeys at the rein can bargain effectively. I bet the aunties at my millipede infested market can bargain better than them.

Now the main issue is selling Ruud. It's obvious he's probably leaving the team. While for once, the board has refused to sell someone on the cheap. I hope the Ruud saga doesn't drag on for too long. The longer it goes, the less his value becomes. He might even become a locker room cancer, thus devaluing him further. And of course when that happens, be prepared to be lowballed.

As for purchases, I hope we get Vieira from Juve. He's been tested and proven to be effective in the EPL. The last thing we need is another Veron, Kleberson, Djemba Djemba or Liam Miller coming in and raising our hopes and wasting our money.

Torres looks like a good target to replace Ruud too. I used to think he was like Joaquim, someone big and tall, but weak physically. However the World Cup has proven otherwise. Torres has proven himself to be every bit as physical as the top strikers playing in the EPL. I hope when we do get him, it wouldn't be for the moon.

New Jersey

I puked my dinner out the first time I saw the new jersey. That AIG logo has got to be the ugliest piece of shit on a shirt! They may have paid a king's ransom to have that logo on the Manchester United jersey, but it's going to be a marketing nightmare, coz it looks goddamn awful. It better not reflect the way the players play though.